Joseph #9

“Becoming a Believer of Integrity and Forgiveness”
The Life of Joseph #9
October 5th, 2008
Pastor Ben Fleming

Turn in your bible to Genesis chapter 45. Has anyone every heard the phrase, “Big boys do no cry?” How many guys in here have every been told that????? How many of you have said it? How many women have been told –“girls do not cry?????” Perhaps this is the reason most men have trouble crying. Maybe this is the reason why older men seem to cry a lot in their final years – they are simply letting out all the tears they have kept bottle up. …… When someone cries or is crying we think they are weak. We want them to stop so that everything will be okay --- it bothers us when we are around someone who cries. We sometimes think…. “If you are tough and if you are a person of real character --- you do not cry……” Little boys grow up being told that they do not cry.. they are to be tough. We have been programmed to think that way even though as a believer in Christ we know it is not true but we find ourselves sometimes speaking that emotionally damaging statement. We are going to study Joseph today and we are going to see that weeping is a quality of a man of character. Write that in at the top of your outline. Weeping

Weeping is real character. Learning to weep and sob and allowing tears in our lives is emotionally healthy, it is spiritually healthy and mentally healthy. On June the 9th at 1130am I spoke to my son Benjamin and he told me “Dad, there is no heartbeat”… I hung up the phone that morning and began to learn and experience what weeping and sobbing was all about. I began to learn some of what it meant to weep and allow others around me to weep and to weep with others. Weeping should be part of our lives. It is not just an emotion that God has assigned only to grief and pain but it is also to be an emotion of joy, and thankfulness. My 84 year old father called me this week and at the end of the conversation asked me “must a person be baptized to be saved?” he gave me the chance to go through the gospel again with him and as I hung up I found my self gently weeping tears of joy and thankfulness.

As we have been learning – Joseph was a man of character – he was a man of God – he was a man of prayer – he was man of wisdom – a man of forgiveness but he was also a man of tears. He knew how to weep – he had learned to weep and had experienced the healing and joy that came from weeping…..

Last week we found that Joseph could now trust his brothers. He had put his brothers through test after test and they had passed with flying colors. Joseph knew that he could trust them. He remembered what kind of men they were when he was 17 years old and in and through the tests that he walked them through he had seen that God had been working in their hearts and minds and changed them into brothers whom he could trust. Stand as we read 45. PRAY

BACKGROUND
The emotions that Joseph had kept bottled up inside finally came out. In verse 1, He told all of the Egyptians to leave the room and leave him alone with his brothers. He sobbed and sobbed and wept so loudly that they still heard him on the other side of door. Most likely his weeping came from feelings of – joy and thankfulness. Through his tears he said--- “I am Joseph. Is my father still living?” The brothers were terrified – they had no idea what was happening. They were speechless and fear gripped them. Perhaps Joseph could see this through his tears and because he was a compassionate man – he says to them (softly) “come close to me” --- look at me ----don’t remember me??? it is me your brother. I am Hebrew just like you. I am the one you sold into Egypt.”

Listen to the maturity of Joseph ------ “do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for what you have done, because it was for saving of lives that God sent me ahead of you. Look at verse 7 “But God --- I love the word but in the bible – but God --- it was God who sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth to save your lives by a great deliverance --- and again He says, it was not you --- but it was God. Do you see here how Joseph understood the sovereignty of God in his life???? He knew that all that went on in his life was God’s plan…... Do you believe that today? Do you believe God is in control of your health? Do you believe God is in control of our economy? Do you believe God is in control of your finances and He knows what He is working out and what He is aiming to teach you? Would you be able to say --- but God???

We are going to see Joseph address the issue of the sovereignty of God over evil next week in chapter 50 as we end our study of the character of Joseph. Joseph must have sensed an urgency… so he commands his brothers to hurry back to Jacob and tell him that Joseph is alive and that Joseph is ruler over Egypt and that he is to come back to Egypt with the brothers where Joseph will take care of them and feed them. “I will provide for you – there are still 5 more years of famine to come – quickly bring my father down here.” And then look what Joseph does in verse 14 – He throws his arms around his brother Benjamin and wept and Benjamin embraced him and he too was weeping. This was not weeping because of grief or sorrow but it was weeping from joy and complete forgiveness and love. And then Joseph kissed all his brothers and wept over them and then his brothers talked with him. ---- there is no grief here. It is a weeping of joy and thankfulness. These brothers had been reunited in heart and spirit – they sat together and talked and experienced deep fellowship with complete trust and forgiveness. What a picture for us of what the family of God is suppose be.

Story: Some years ago there was a film called The Promise. It was a story of a young man and woman who were engaged and deeply in love. A week before their wedding they were involved in a terrible car accident. Both of them were badly hurt and the girls face was terribly disfigured. While they were recovering in the hospital in separate rooms – they young mans mother visited the soon to be daughter in law. She had never liked her and did not want her to marry her son. She told the badly injured girl that she would secretly pay for all the plastic surgery to restore her face if she promised to disappear and never have anything to do with her son. She was suffering – alone – in trauma and agony and confused so she made a promise to do so. The mother told her son that the girl had died in the accident. Years later through an unusual chain of events the young man and woman met again. He had not changed greatly so he was easy to recognize. She tried to keep her promise but circumstances brought them together and he began to recognizer her. He realized the woman he loved was still alive and eventually they were joined finally in a scene romantic reconciliation. Can you imagine the tears of joy for them?? The story does not tell us what happened to the mother.

When was the last time you shed tears of joy???? When was the last time you shed tears because of forgiveness and the restoration of trust between you and someone else???????? When was the last time you shed tears because of your sin???

I do not ask those questions to make you feel guilty but to have you think about the character of Joseph --- his tears showed his human side but they also showed his heart attitude. Here was a man who had more power – prestige and authority than any man in the world and yet he never lost his ability to be tender – to show compassion and feel deeply. (softly) God…..wants you and me to have the same heart that Joseph did.

A LOOK AT JOSEPH’S TEARS

1. Joseph wept when he saw the softened hearts of his brothers. (42:21-24) “The brothers said to each other, “Surely we are being punished because of our brother. We saw how distressed he was when he pleaded with us for his life, but we would not listen; that’s why this distress has come upon us.” Reuben replied, “Didn’t I tell you not to sin against the boy? But you wouldn’t listen! Now we must give an accounting for his blood.” They did not realize that Joseph could understand them, since he was using an interpreter. Joseph turned away from them and began to weep…” Why did he weep?? Maybe he remembered the pain he felt as they talked about what they did to him but more than likely because of the heart of Joseph - he was moved because he heard them acknowledge their sin…… He was moved to weep because of softened hearts. This is what can happen to you in a prayer group or a small group when someone in the group is so honest that they confess their sins specifically in that group. God moves in your heart and I have to say that the emotions that I have felt have been ones of joy. Joy that someone is honest. Joy that I am trusted to be able to hear someone’s confession of sin. Joy that someone is confessing their sins to one another and that healing is sure to follow in that persons life.

When was the last time you confessed your sin to another believer? When was the last time you were in a small group and heard someone else confess? We must learn to weep because of a softened heart that is sensitive to sin.

2. Joseph wept out of compassion for Benjamin’s welfare. (43:30-31) “Deeply moved at the sight of his brother, he hurried out and looked for a place to weep.” For years, Joseph must have wondered how his brothers were treating his youngest brother Benjamin. Did they do similar things to him that they did to him? Joseph’s weeping was from the joy of seeing his baby brother. The compassion in his heart for his brother provoked weeping. It had been over 17 years since he last saw him . We must learn to weep with compassion for a brother or sisters welfare. DAN’S TESTIMONY

3. Joseph wept when he saw the true repentance of his brother Judah. (44:33) Judah’s repentant confession most likely touched the heart of Joseph more than any other event. He wept uncontrollably because he saw true repentance. Judah stood before him and said that he would himself become a slave and take the place of his brother Benjamin. Some 23 years earlier Judah was the one who said to his brothers, “let’s sell our brother to the traders”. Joseph heard his repentance. He heard his heart and wept over what his brother said. Judah did exactly what the apostle Paul told King Agrippa in Acts 26:20 “repent and turn to God and prove your repentance by your deeds”. Judah’s deeds was the willingness of his heart to take Benjamin’s place and become a slave.

4. Joseph wept when he was reconciled with his brothers. (45:14-15) He no longer hide from them but he revealed his true identity to them. His brothers saw who he was and that he had no grudges against them. Joseph threw his arms around his brother Benjamin and wept and Benjamin embraced him and wept. And then Joseph kissed all his brothers and wept over them. Tears of joy because of reconciliation. Joseph worked hard for this moment and it was a time of joy. The apostle Paul wrote to the believers at Philipi ---- “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” Joseph was rejoicing not in his brothers but in the Lord. He knew that God had been working in his brothers and he knew that God had brought this reconciliation about. I cannot imagine the pleasure that God was experiencing as He saw this time with Joseph and his brothers.

I have to confess that as I think back over my years of walking with Jesus and knowing that I am a believer in Christ I can think of more times of broken relationships than I can of reconciled relationships……. Perhaps that is because I have not worked as hard as Joseph to be a reconciler but I do know that God wants you and me to work hard at being reconcilers and to weep when there is reconciliation between brothers and sisters in Christ.

5. Joseph wept when he was reunited with his father and at his father’s death. (46:29,50:1) Death is perhaps the most common reason for weeping in almost every culture. I remember when 5 Boy Scouts were killed in a car crash in my hometown when I was in the 5th grade. I remember going to the funeral home and hearing all the weeping. I have been the pastor for many funerals in the past 13 years and I have seen and heard a lot of weeping. I can remember and feel how fresh the weeping of this past June was in my own life and with my family. David wrote these words about his 5 year old son. “I climbed into bed with Chris, I was resolved that if another son of ours would die, he would not die alone. I wept and sobbed as I held my son that night and I talked to through my tears as he slept. “Daddy loves you. We all love you. Jesus loves you.

You do not have to be afraid. If you do not wake up, you’ll go to be with Him….. and we will see you again…. And we’ll be happy, we’ll be healthy and we’ll understand.” Weeping at death for us as a believer can be because of loss and the pain in the loss…. but we must learn also to weep at death for a believer because scripture tells us that although the believer who has died is “away from the body…. they are at home with the Lord.”

So --- when you hear of a funeral – be there and learn to weep with those who weep. Do not avoid the chance to be around death.

6. Joseph wept when he saw the grief caused by his brother’s guilt. (50:17) He wept because of his brothers guilt…… Does that not show you how compassionate this man was? I cannot say that I have ever wept because of someone’s guilt. Joseph had completely forgiven them and now he was emotionally upset enough to weep because they were still gripped with fear and guilt. Peter wept because of his guilt after denying Jesus 3 times but here is a man of God weeping over someone else’s guilt. Oh God teach us to weep because of the guilt of a fellow believer. Lessons we can learn from the weeping of Joseph

Weeping Lessons

* You cannot genuinely embrace a person you have not fully forgiven. If you cannot touch a person who has hurt you and insulted you - you cannot and do not see God’s purpose in using them in your life……. Look at (verse 5.) “Do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you”. Joseph was able to see that what happened and how it happened…. God used for His glory and His purposes.

Romans 8:29 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purposes”

So – who have you not fully forgiven? Who can you not genuinely embrace in your present or from your past?

* Weeping can be a sign of great strength. No one would every look at Joseph and conclude that he was a weak man. He endured pain and loss and suffering and in the end rises to a position of great power and could have very easily gotten revenge on his brothers. But through out the story we see a heart of compassion and forgiveness. He found great healing from his pain through weeping. Instead of a scripture I put this application on your outline:
We must never allow pride to keep us from doing what God says is normal ! When you hurt, do not be afraid to weep. The very fact that you do not or run from weeping is a weakness.

* Weeping is normal and healthy under certain circumstances but it should never be used as a manipulation for selfish reasons. Some people have developed the art of weeping. Some societies will pay for mourners who weep to come to a funeral. Some of you have seen people who use weeping to manipulate people --- preachers have done it --- musicians have done it --- it is almost like you can predict what is going to happen. When you use weeping to manipulate others you hurt yourself and confuse others around you.

* Sincere weeping will often clear the way for objective and honest communication with those who have hurt us. You can see this with Joseph ---- after their weeping – he spent time talking with them. The bible does not tell us how much time he spent with them before he sent them off to Canan to get Jacob but you can imagine all that they had to catch up on from the past 20 years or so.

C.S Lewis wrote after the death of his wife, “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken…. The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and confusions of love is hell… We shall draw nearer to God, not by trying to avoid the sufferings inherent in all loves, but by accepting them and offering them to Jesus….. throwing away all our defensive armor. It our hearts need to be broken and if He chooses this as the way in which they should break, so be it.”

Let us pray: Lord teach us to weep. Teach us to shed tears over hearts that are softened towards sin. Help us to weep over the true repentance of a believer. Help us to weep when broken relationships are healed and restored and Heavenly Father we do not know how to weep at death. Thank you for the life of Joseph. Thank you that whatever was written in earlier times was written for our encouragement and that through perseverance and the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope. In the name of your Son Jesus who wept. Amen